well guess what?

guess what im devoting my day off to doing? speading my love from miles away by using my incredible crafting abilities and thoughtful creativity. it all came to me when i was eating fresh olives (my favorite) and spitting the pits on the floor. the dog was then trying to eat them like they were food but then realized they are like rocks. man what a dumb/cute dog. mom promises me a new puppy, but i dont know where the hell that is?

i want a polaroid camera and to quit my job. so does my bff barb. when you read that fast it looks like barf.

amy, can you post/email me your address please?
i want to fuck shit up. its too bad we can like ride our bikes and be palz at 2 am. its too bad we cant meet the drag queens and laugh at boys and drink wine out of the bottle on a stoop somewhere.

walruses

i got distracted while i was talking on the phone and i drew all these walruses on my legs. there's a big one, too, and he's saying "LET'S GO!"

today at work, we got bored and read some of the wu manual. bookmaster funfact: a search for "rza" will not get you the wu manual. you have to search for "the rza." i like work. i do not like that all of my shifts this week are "early" shifts, which means waking up at 7 (!).

i can't stop listening to the magnetic fields.

riding to work is fun. oh man. i saw two tandem bicycles today. the first one was piloted by a very athletic-looking couple who wore spandex. they passed through harvard square twice. i wonder what the rest of their life is like. the second one was black with gold stars and it was gorgeous and it was parked in davis.

work makes me too tired: i get home and i have no energy to decorate. only one poster and one xerox of jean-paul belmondo in a bathtub grace my walls.

i heard my grandmother swear today.

basically i had a good weekend. friday was mullens for stevo/palz. saturday was work and i nursed a wicked hangover. sunday (today) was the art museum, lunch with mom/mb, saw john and joanna, picked up muncie, chilled drank wine and read books.

this week i work kind of a lot and i meant to request 2 or 3 nights off next week, but i dont know if it's too late to do that. i still don't get how things work with silverware at the restaurant, but everything else went pretty smoothly. i will probably make some decent money. that does not mean that i like the job though because i dont.

mb is real sick and i look forward to beth coming back home. i actually have 170$ in my bank account which is a whopping 150$ more than i've had in there for the last two months. should i really blow it all on a brief trip to boston in three weeks??

time travel

so today during my lunchbreak, i was eating my sandwich on the grass, and this creepy old guy was smiling at me. "oh man, creepy old guy," i thought. but then i stopped myself: "amy, don't assume the old guy is creepy. maybe he's just smiling cos he's happy. don't be so cynical." so i go back to my lunch and ten minutes later he's still staring at me. "oh man, i was right the first time. avoid eye contact avoid eye contact."

anyway, i go back to work and forget about it. work continues to be chill. four hours of running around and answering questions about books and running around and then i leave and as i'm going to get my bike, the same creepy guy runs up next to me and says "oh, hey! i owe you an apology for something."

"um, no, you don't," i say.

"yes i do: i lost your phone number."

"no, you didn't." (oh my god he's crazy.)

"well, see, i've been time-traveling, and in the past, you and i were friends, and you stopped calling me because you thought i was annoying."

i'm overwhelmed. first, i think he's talking about the MIT time-travel convention. then i realize he's just fucking crazy.

he continues, "so i need your phone number."

"no, you don't." i say very quickly, while walking very quickly.

"okay. i can accept that. it was worth a try." and then i dart into a shoe store to end the conversation just in case it wasn't ending.

then i end up looking at shoes for half an hour, which causes me to get on my bike just as the first raindrops were falling. i end up riding home in a fucking monsoon and arrive home saturated with rainwater and coated in a fine layer of grit. did i mention i was wearing a skirt? i walk in the door and megan says, "oh! you look really sad! but, in a funny way!" exactly.

tuesday june 7th

aren't you so excited that johnny damon is being made over on queer eye for the straight guy?
shit, i am.

some mirah lyrics (i can't help it), followed by a brief memo

1.
"now the trouble with everything always is nothing's just right/ just to figure out nothing could keep you awake half the night/ not to know what you want is a terrible thing, you should fight/ you just suffer the face of the dark while you wait for the light."

2.
dear boys,

please try not to get all giddy about me until you sit down and seriously think about things and make sure you are actually "ready for a relationship." okay? thanks.

all best,
amy

also

i just found out that we get the soap opera channel and they play dynasty every day.

...i just cant stop.

i passed my restaurant test. i have my first real shift tonight and then again on saturday night. wish me luck because i basically cheated on that test. this means i dont actually know what is going on and will fuck up a whole bunch. i only have two tables and am taking the dog for a walk in the park/reading date so it should all be swell. rib cookoff with the west siders tomorrow and maybe a party for a bunch of boys i met at the "wine cave." it should be funny, hilarious actually. look forward to it.

funny things about s. korea:
-they hate black people.
-everyone has bad gas.
-their word for "player" translates to "greasy."

oh, oui, je t'aime, je t'aaaaaaime.*

my roommates are having the loudest sex ever. it's really . . . wow.

now, to be fair, i think the loudness has a lot to do with the fact that i do not currently have a door on my room. let's hope so, at least.

yeah, i would like to put my door up. that would be cool. it would complete the whole "room" look that i've been going for. and muffle the sex noises and stuff.

*just to clarify, my roommates are not jane birkin and serge gainesbourg. i don't really know whether to be sad or happy about that.

what equals a tiger?

i had my first day of work at el bookstore and i love the people i work with. they are all silly, hyper, sarcastic, overly-literate weirdos who say things like "what equals a tiger?" and get excited when they learn about obscure midwest slang like "sugarjets!" right now i'm working parttime but it sounds like there might be some shifting around later on whereby i could pick up some more shifts. so keep your fingers crossed, ok? i almost wrote "ships." yeah, amy, you can pick up some more ships. right.

obviously, i'm half asleep. this is because alberto kept me up late last night acting like the dramaaaatic teenage girl he is, all wanting to talk about his feelings and shit. i'm trying not to take his drama too seriously. i like this boy a lot, even if he does have the emotions, temperment, and record collection of a 16 year old girl.

so to sum up: i graduated sunday, i moved into my new apartment (with fantastic housemates fluker, professor hoitink, and patrick) monday, and today (ie tuesday) started my new job. it has been a whirlwind.

and if you look at the ten day forecast it says rain rain rain rain rain rain rain rain rain rain rain. but even though it feels like february i can tell that it's summer and i'm happy that it's summer and i think it will be a good one. especially when the rain lets up and i can actually ride bikes and be outside and stuff.

nothing is really new. went out with people from work last night. my managers are pretty chill and it was funny to see who is dating who and to figure out who the sluts are. i felt like i was in highschool with a game of 'never have i ever.' i'm realizing i actually haven't done a lot of things. i didn't once get called a 'slut.' is that good or bad?

paul is cute. we fight, but i love him. it's totally lame that i'm totally stupid for him. i just want to be like 'jacqueline, grow up! date someone you can see on a daily basis for once!' but i probably wouldn't even listen to myself. i hope this summer flies by and i make a lot of money. i also hope i somehow, somewhere, get to the beach.

"oh are these people stupid!"

my mom and i were watching the price is right. i made a few new friends at work. some of the boys are real cute. i dont have to work the rest of the weekend except for wine tasting class on sunday. it's MB's 19th birthday so i think we're going to dave and busters. bethy and marko hangout all weekend?

in other news, we have a sexual predator on the street. he just got out of jail for raping two girls, one 2 years old, the other 5 years old. my mom and i are going to be bitches and leave the printout with his picture and info in his door so he knows that we know. i have a feeling uncle sam may somehow threaten him. i'd be okay with that. if i had a knife or something, maybe i'd just do it myself.

ps: i had steak for breakfast.

that was a strange phone call

so i'm waiting to hear back about this job at a bookstore. i already got a parttime job at bookstore 1, but bookstore 2 is cuter and has fulltime positions availible. however, my interview there was mediocre and the manager kept saying "this job is incredibly exhausting." anyway so bookstore 2 calls me today and i miss the call. i call back and the guy is like, "oh, sorry, i actually i called you accidentally. i meant to call someone else to turn them down for a job but i picked up the wrong application." weird. so at least i didn't not get the job yet.

i hate not knowing what i'm going to be doing/ how i'm going to afford rent etc. this summer. i will be a lot happier in a couple weeks when this all gets settled.

i also hate being sick in such nice weather. it feels unnatural.

i do not hate living with megan, because it really is true that she cooks/ bakes every twenty minutes or so. last night i got home from a "noise"/ "free folk" show at 1am and there were chocolate chip peanut butter cookies in the oven. perfect.

i should really clean my room and do laundry. i don't know if this will happen. whatever i end up doing today, i will most likely be blowing my nose and/or wearing a bmx helmet while i do it.

hey, i know you.

indeed, i did spend time in the car with paul and greg. they didn't let me touch the *cassette tape adapter (continual breakage) nor ipods. i mostly was crabby and in the back seat. well thats sort of a lie. i drove for about 4 hours and talked to greg while he was driving. there was one point where i was sharing the passenger seat with paul with our seatbelts on because i was upset i was being left out. they stayed in clevo until sat morning and in that time we: ate a lot, esp. at tommy's, took photobooth pictures, snuck into a show, slept, drank, went to the art museum, drove around, had fun. im sad that i will miss him (him being paul), but i guess there's always september. he laid that whole "i'll be waiting for you in september. don't forget about me." thing on me which was real cute. im actually really surprised i didn't cry.

they spent the last day in omaha, ne at ms. monen's family's house. i hear it was a good time. except im slightly concerned that paul may have told one of the members of son ambulance, one of emily's bff's, that their band is terrible.

today was my first day of work and i really want a bike. i dont have a car and my work is within riding distance but they are kind of militant about "uniforms" and "wearing them all the time including when you get into work" and "don't bring anything to work, no money, no cell phones, no purses, no nothing." you'd think its some kind of other world. its right by trader joe's so i can grocery shop for non-junk food (it's all we seem to have around here) and also by anthropologie (new clothes), and also by cold stone creamery (ice cream!). the back room smelled like the deli i once worked at and so i almost threw up in my mouth.

last night was spent at the boys' new house, which i like immensely. it was really good to see everyone. its always like i never left. i think everyones pretty *ehh feeling about me, but i like them, so it should be good. oh i also bought the greatest polo shirt of all time (ralph lauren, salmon, xs, cute collar, non-piqued fabric!), and some mocassins (white). my haircut turned out to be the number 1 greatest i've had in awhile. i missed ferris' party this past weekend, and ended up at an afterprom, but all in all, clevo is happening. i'm doing okay. slightly better than okay, but not good. you know what i mean. i miss and love you amy. you can call me any time.

jacqueline, are you alive?

way to update, jacqueline. but i was in a van, you say. i was in a van with beson and paul driving to cleveland and i couldn't get to a computer and i was too busy making the boys sandwiches and being in charge of the itrip to think about my blogging responsibilities.

well i guess that is as good an excuse as any. but i miss you! are you alive? did you make it to ohio? i guess i could just call you, but this is more fun.

meanwhile, things here have been eventful. quick update:

tuesday: woke up at noon to joseph knocking on my door screaming "it's the inagural ride of the jaguars!" rode downtown, joseph bought a sword. got drunk accidentally at the other side, at 3 ish. rode back. drank some coffee on the lawn. met a guy who said he was "just scopin'" on emily because she was "holdin' that coffee like it's fifty below zero. holdin' it like it's so precious it took your mother nine months to make it."

wednesday: had my last final ever, and then rode bikes to the decordova. well, we tried to get to the decordova, but we got sort of lost. so first we ended up in concord, then we found walden pond, and then we finally got to the decordova. of course, by then, it was closed. highlights of the trip: patrick riding home with his wet underwear tied to his bike, the trail that felt like dino dino jungle, the old man who said "fate has brought us together here."

thursday: photographed my poetry teacher for his new book. i hope the photos came out okay. he kept on smirking and then saying "oh god, sorry, i'm smirking again." it was really funny.

friday: good times. ice ball is exactly the same as ski ball, except it costs twice as many tokens and you win twice as many tickets.

saturday and sunday: beach party at leah's house. drank beer, grilled things, skipped rocks. slept in the middle of the room, awkwardly surrounded by four people. spent the next day cooking an incredibly elaborate breakfast and not being hungry enough to eat all of it.

H O I T I N K !

my day in movies:

4:30. stole lindsey's ipod out of her room so i could knit it a sweater. while knitting, watched bande a part in the downstairs living room. it was amazing. i am determined to learn the dance they do at the bar. oh man oh man. then emily and anne and seamus wandered in and i tried to catch them up on the plot/ recruit them as dance partners. then emily made broccoli and rice and we started talking about plans for the evening. then i realized OH SHIT i have work tonight and ran to the tower, fifteen minutes late. second to last shift ever. super busy because of finals.

11:00. got home from work and seamus and kevin and aaron were about halfway through blues brothers. i wasn't planning to watch, but i saw the part where john belushi says "your daughters . . . the women . . . i want to buy your daughters" to the guy in the fancy restaurant and i just couldn't leave. convinced aaron to let me write H O I T I N K across his knuckles the way elwood has E L W O O D tattooed across his in the movie. aaron pointed to his blank left pinky and said, "it needs an exclamation point." there are moments when i really do love aaron.

now i'm eating tomato soup and listening to all girl summer fun band. what else would i be doing? goodnight.

a new season has got to begin.

i'm going to consider private investigation for a future career. i'm good at finding out the details and maintaining distance.

fun party last night! everyone was so funny. i really enjoy megan's company. the girl busts me up.

up till seven, sleep till 2. that's how it goes. sundays are always my saddest days. i'm preparing for a serious test and a serious talk. i've taken to hating underwear.

you may laugh that i have to live with a hippie next year, but lets examine some other information:
a. the same girl im going to "live with" is the one that is basically leading you and your "bike gang" to this "wake up the earth" festival. i have a strange feeling that the earth is already alive.
b. who is bff's with emily good? i'm pretty sure it's not me.
c. who still paints their nails blue?

i think i need more hippies in my life

because i just decorated megan's cruiser - - i painted the handlebars pink, tied ribbons to everything, packagetaped two dinosaurs, a duck with hair, three tiny airplanes, a dragonfly and two bunnies to the frame, and also tied on fake flowers and leaves - - and there is no one here who can really appreciate the glory. i need emily good right now. she would probably collapse with joy.

well, the good news is, i think we might go to wake up the earth fest on saturday, and i can't think of a better place to find hippies than a festival/parade dedicated to "celebrating life" and "community building."

speaking of hippies, haha kish has to live with one next year.

two wonderful things happened today:
1. art as process final projects were COMPLETED
2. the young ones dvds came in the mail!

i'm going to bed. i will have sweet sweet dreams about rik and vyvyan.

bright pink. kind of like magenta. bright.

people are so annoying. i have no reason to say that statement, but i have a feeling it's true. i'm really not all that annoyed. im a little more "zombie," but just felt like saying it.

i've been thinking more and more about that dog. about how me and patty and joseph are gonna get one. and how i might have to live with a hippie next year. i might even like it.

hey, look below. a complete stranger made a comment. who knew?

hey, can't we leave last names out of this?


new buddy tattoo?


jacqueline kish sucks, big-time

because
a) she will not let me in her bike gang. which means that i will never be in a bike gang, because i am not going to whittle a wooden sword anytime soon. i will have to take to the streets of boston alone, and meet my own drag queens in my own diners. (and i probably won't even have to beg seamus for a ride back. you fucking pussy.)

b) she will not let me look at or play with her hypothetical puppy.

c) she does not like the young ones.

and finally

d) in her own words:
dinosaurhaircuts: its my personal duty to spread rumors on the internet
dinosaurhaircuts: im sorry they always have to be about you

basically, her butt stinks. she is a stinky butthole.

okay i'm going to stop pretending to be mean on the internet and go take a MUCH needed nap.

ps: yay, i got a call back about a bookstore job today. yay.

sleepy.

yesterday: isabella gardner museum. coffee. t. hairstyle. quick hello/nap. epic bike ride. diner visit. drag queens. sore bum. sleep at 4:32 am.

amy you missed it. i did indeed initiate the bike ride. i also complained the entire time and couldnt even walk home because my legs were jelloey. seamus had to drive me. all in all, we started a new bike gang, and you can't be in it. you're tied to jen's and you have to build a sword to be in that one. too bad this one all you had to do was go on a bike ride with us last night and you missed it. haha.

also, you should also know that amy thought she was so cool ordering "DVDs" of the young ones off ebay from david goligorsky's account until she looked and realized it was on laser disc! either she's going to have to buy a laser disc player, or watch them all in the library. truly unfortunate. amy, lets get it together. you have to graduate soon. i'll try to help you as much as i can. first thing we're going to do is sell that "DVD" back to some sucker on the internet.

ps: aaron schulman wants to have sex with leah on top of the metcalf roof and is going to try to okay it with mike!! eep!! i was throwing up in my mouth and it's all because a freshman bet they made.

school's out for summer and school's also out for summer

today i had my last class ever. me and megan bought candy to celebrate.

below, an im conversation about how me and lex agree that our film professor is wayyy overrated:

caribouamy: did you hear someone go "what the FUCK?" when people applauded today?caribouamy: cos yeah that was me
alexisdyslexia: hahahaha
alexisdyslexia: i said, "can we leave yet?" and people looked at me
caribouamy: hahaha

so just a few more final projects and stuff and i'm done forevs. i'm not sure if that is awesome or scary.

now i'm going to take a nap before work. tonight i work with the girl who makes me wear my hat. lame.

notes for spring

thurs. 4/28: homework. lab report. last jumpstart. phone struggle. lonely. dearborn hangout. wine. bus #87 2x. his grandma died.
fri. 4/29: asthma. quiz. illegal printing (60+ pages). lazy in bed. fight. make up on phone. sit on porch. listen to music. drink beers. smile. meet casey/dave. burritos. steal flower. trip on sidewalk. say hello. say goodbye. come home. go to sleep.
sat. 4/30: early wake-up. goof off (2 hours). breafast @ renee's cafe. liquor store. rain. spring fling (cancelled). margaritas (circa 1:00). talk to beth. walk around. more drinking (12 straight hours). spoon amy. asshole. build a fort. seder. singing. darts. cooking. try to stay there. get upset. come home. sleep terribly.
sun. 5/1: call in the am. fall back asleep. come over. try to not break up. get sad. fall back asleep. realize i'm fine without boys. get jstart materials. shower. coffee shop for homework. M (the movie). get bored. leave so don't get sick. coffee shop again. steal food. bullshit (at dearborn, 1.5 hours). back home. soon: study, go to sleep.

lessons learned: chill out. stop being dramatic. don't lose this one. don't give it up atleast. don't become a professional alcoholic. fall in love with a masseur so your back doesn't hurt. don't be a baby. smile. big. like smile real big. it's spring.